Saturday, January 5, 2008

Well not quite Monday

Kaidnce is no longer going to come home on Monday. She had some very low blood oxygen levels last night. Because of this they are going to watch her very carefully. They will run some more tests to see if they can find out the reason. So She wont be comming home for a week or more. We had a couple hour long interview to make sure we know what to expect and what we will need to do for her. Now we will have time to prepare our house for our sweet little one.

Friday, January 4, 2008

MONDAY IS THE BIG DAY!!!

Kaidence is loving life. No more IV meds, breathing tubes or oxygen. All she has is a line in her chest to help so that we can draw her rejection medication levels when she goes home without her needing to be poked. She will go home on 15 medications so I may be pretty darn busy but that's ok. She looks great!

Monday is our big day (supposedly). Kaidence gets to go home. Can you believe it? We are so excited. We are so ready and at the same time so sad. I know that sounds crazy but most likely only those that have been in our shoes can understand this. Since July these people at the hospital have been our life. They have been there for us in our darkest hours. We are going to miss those relationships terribly. We have made so many friendships and these are the people that Kaidence knows. So many first for Kaidence have happened in the PICU including all 3 of her teeth. I also feel so sad and my heart aches for all of our friends that could not bring their babies home. Part of me feels guilty and yet I know that they would never want me to feel that way. I will celebrate these little angels everyday as I raise Kaidence. I will think of them and the lessons I have learned every time I look at Kaidence. I have cried all night as I have thought about our friends that we have met along the way. I want them to know that I love them and that they hold the most dearest place in my heart. I will never forget the time that we spent exhausted and worried as we talked over our little ones beds. I will never forget the spirit that could be felt in the unit as a little one returned home to our Heavenly Father. These lesson of life are forever in me. Thank You to those that have cried with me, laughed with me and worried with me. And now thank you to those that rejoice with me.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

I LOVE HOLDING MY BABY!!!

Kaidence is so happy. Mike wasn't feeling that great and so he stayed home with the boys. I was able to spend the day with her today and we had such a great day. When I walked in and said "hi kaidence" her little face got the biggest smile across it. I would tickle her and she would giggle in a soft, raspy voice. We sat her in her stroller and she loved being out of bed. I even rocked her to sleep twice and I loved holding her so close to me. She is apparently doing well because they are no longer giving us her heart nurses. We will miss them so much, it makes me sad. I really learned to trust them and it made it easier to go home more often. The boys want Kaidence home. Camden keeps telling me that sissy is better and that Santa is going to bring her home. I can't wait for the first night home. Everybody keeps asking if I am scared. I figured it can't be worse than bringing her home on all 9 of the medications in August and that included 2 IV antibiotics and a PIC line, learning how to place a feeding tube and calculate calories and feeds and the 2 times a week doctor appts. That was all dropped on us at once and so I am hoping that I will at least feel a little more comfortable. I will just have to learn all new warning signs for rejection, brush up on my CPR and figure out a schedule and how to keep germs away with two little boys. YIKES! We are just so excited and we want Kaidence home when she is ready.
My thoughts have been with the family that gave us Kaidence's little heart. I think about them multiple times a day and wish they could know how grateful we are. I think we have to wait a year to write to them. I hope that they will be happy with their child's heart going to our little Kaidence. I don't want to disappoint them or let them down. They are always in our prayers.

We will work on getting more pictures on the blog. Tomorrow will tell us alot if she can get off of the cpap.

Please pray for little Alex. He has a big day tomorrow!
Thanks for all of your love!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!! We hope that 2008 will be GREAT! GREAT! GREAT! A year full of good health, joy and friendship. Kaidence was asleep as we brought in the new year, but we still called her and yelled HAPPY NEW YEAR! The nurse said she did stir a little.

Well, today is hopefully going to be the big day that I get to hold Kaidence. I am so excited I can't wait. She is getting out all of her heart lines from the surgery and will only have the 1 new line that was placed in her chest yesterday. They needed a line to take blood samples without always poking her. We are very excited about the progress that is being made. There is talk that tomorrow they will try to ween her off the cpap machine that helps her breathe. If that works we will be another step closer to home. If you couldn't see that scars you would never know all that this little girl has endured. She truly is very special.