Monday, December 22, 2008


I have had about two hours of sleep and my eyelids are so heavy, but I wanted to quickly update about this morning. So, I of course woke up feeling.....exhausted, frustrated, stressed and VERY emotional. I knew that this day was coming and I still have many emotions to deal with regarding Kaidence's transplant. I know that sounds very weird and I thought that I had dealt with all my feelings, but apparently not. Today was the day a year ago that we got "the call" telling us that our prayers have been answered and that Kaidence was getting a new heart. Everything happened so quickly from that point on and I have been so busy caring for her since that I haven't really been able to work through some feelings. These are good feelings of gratitude but also the ongoing heartbreak that I think I may always carry in my heart for our donor family. I am still just so amazed that someone would give us such an amazing gift. I have worried about our donor family so much lately. So needless to say I have some emotional stuff going on. I couldn't even walk to the cafeteria today without crying because every time I walked by, kind people were dropping off gifts for the children at the hospital for Christmas. We truly live in a very unique and kind community. Not all children's hospitals have this type of support.
Anyhow, as the day went on, things with Kaidence got better. She is still very tired but is getting better all the time. Every blood, stool, snot and urine sample sent out has come back negative, so that is good, but her CRP increased today to 22 (not good). Her echo looked fine. The medical team consulted with cardiology and let them know that the "illness" that Kaidence has, has been going around and that they have also seen elevated CRP's in others kids with the same symptoms. So the plan is that if no fevers occur during the night, we can go H _ _ _ tomorrow. What a great way to celebrate Kaidence's "Angel Heart" birthday tomorrow. To think, last year we were holding Kaidencce for the last time before she went off to surgery and now here we are a year later looking forward to spending Christmas together as a family. Thanks for your prayers, they are working!


carolyn q said...

I am praying that she is doing better and that you are home getting some sleep.
I too have been thinking of the gift that Kaidence received last year. I can only imagine the emotions you feel, but from a prospective of a parent who's child has passed. . .it would have given me great joy in such a time of such sadness for my loss to know that another child was living on because of mine.
By the way . .you have every right to be emotional too!